Author: Caitie Looby
Feeling a little rough after a Saturday night of escapades? Despite a pounding headache and smeared makeup, you’re able to drag yourself out of bed with a beacon of hope guiding you: the thought of RPCC brunch.
- What time is it? Is brunch even open yet?
- Okay, it’s 11:00. Prime brunching time. Let’s head over.
- It’s cool to head over in pajamas, right?
- I’ll dress it up slightly and put on some sweatpants instead.
- I mean, it’s only brunch. I doubt I’ll even see anyone there.
- Wait, why is the line wrapping all the way down two flights of stairs…
- Who are these people and why are they up at this hour on a Sunday?
- Is this line even worth it?
- Maybe I should just head over to Appel, I hear they also have dim sum.
- Plus Appel is always less crowded…
- NO get your head in the game RPCC is always the move.
- Okay the line isn’t even that bad it’s moving pretty quickly.
- Just made it up a flight of stairs let’s hear it for #progress.
- Thank god everyone is looking as rough as I am right now.
- Wait, is that kid ahead of me the one I met last night?
- Nah, that’s not him, just someone who looks kinda like him.
- I can literally see the entrance. There is hope.
- Gotta get my ID out now – don’t wanna be unprepared when the time comes.
- YES, I’m in. Now it’s time to get down to business.
- First things first: Am I feeling breakfast or lunch right now?
- What am I even thinking it’s brunch aka breakfast and lunch at the same time.
- To omelet line or not to omelet line? That is the true question.
- I can get omelets any day, let’s branch out a little bit.
- IS THAT FRIED RAVIOLI I SEE?!?!
- Okay the choice is made, first course is definitely going to be lunch.
- Ugh the line is long but totally worth it, let’s do this.
- Okay I take it back, that is definitely the guy I met last night.
- Glad he’s seeing me at my absolute finest right now.
- Avoid eye contact at all costs.
- Just focus on the fried pasta goodness that is coming your way.
- Okay got that ravioli…but where have all my friends gone.
- Seriously, RPCC is not that big how did I lose them so easily.
- WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PEOPLE HERE.
- Okay found them, let’s just find a table and go.
- Wait…there are no free tables in here.
- Actually, though – who are all of these people?
- Okay, found a spot. Can finally enjoy this food.
- But wait forgot a fork are you kidding me.
- Whatever not a big deal just gotta go up and get one.
- RPCC please let me know why there is an abundance of knives yet not a clean fork to be found.
- Alright it’s all good finally found one.
- THIS RAVIOLI WAS WORTH EVERY BIT OF PAIN NEEDED TO ACQUIRE IT
- Damn RPCC does not disappoint.
- How did the contents of my entire plate disappear in maybe 2.5 minutes.
- I guess that means it’s time for course number two.
- Let’s switch it up a little maybe even go for some breakfast.
- So many options but I’m thinking a breakfast sandwich is the move right now.
- BUT WAIT – that girl’s pancake looks incredible…
- Long line, but I’m willing to wait it out.
- How am I supposed to fit the amount of pancake toppings I want in this tiny little cup like are you kidding me with this.
- If I add strawberries does that make this decision healthy?
- What if I add strawberries and bananas…then my health cannot be stopped.
- Wait why do I need to be healthy right now? This is RPCC brunch.
- Scratch the health plan, I’m going chocolate chips and sprinkles.
- WAIT they have oreos as an option.
- This is a game changer I was not prepared for.
- Okay I’ve pushed all of the chocolate oreo sprinkle goodness that I can into this tiny cup.
- The rest is in god’s hands aka the pancake chef.
- Now we wait…
- …………..
- Starting to question whether this pancake was even worth it, I feel like it’s been hours.
- And he hasn’t even flipped it yet like is this a joke?
- Okay it’s almost done, soon it will all be worth it.
- Look at this desserty pancake masterpiece that I have created like I should go on Top Chef or something.
- Again, let me know how I ate a pancake that took fifteen minutes to acquire in under four minutes.
- Course Three leggooo
- The dim sum is looking on point today.
- And look the line isn’t even that long.
- Looks like course number three is decided.
- But wow, so many decisions. Do I want an egg roll or potstickers?
- Or both.
- What are those little rice balls, they look like they could be good.
- Oh no, my turn to order and I’m panicking.
- Just point to the four closest things, I’m sure they will be good.
- Okay looks like I’m eating the unidentifiable rice balls.
- Somehow made it out of that line unscathed, now time to enjoy this wonderful Asian fare.
- Third sighting of that kid I met last night, what is even going on?
- Like there are so many people here, why do I keep running into him.
- Dim sum gone already. That happened way too quickly.
- Who knew brunch could be so multi-cultural?
- Do I even need a fourth course though?
- Like at this point, I’ve already brunched pretty hard. I question if I need to eat more.
- Look at your life, look at your choices, what are you doing.
- This is where the freshman fifteen is made.
- When I look back and wonder where the pounds came from it will not be from the alcohol, it will be from RPCC brunch.
- You know what Carpe Diem
- YOLO
- I’m going in for that next course. Who cares about that frosh fifteen.
- I’m going to make this fourth course great too, #treatyourself
- I’m going to make a waffle and it’s going to be amazing.
- Okay a little confused on how the waffle makers are this messy…
- Like seriously people need to learn how to control their batter. This is ridiculous.
- Whatever though I’m still going to make a decadent waffle, let’s go.
- Ugh three minutes, how am I going to pass this time?
- Ooh is that some fresh Cornell dairy yogurt that I see…
- A few spoonfuls of that wouldn’t hurt, I mean I still have 2:46 left on this waffle.
- Plus yogurt is healthy right? Lots of probiotics and stuff.
- Maybe I’ll even sprinkle some granola on it, look at me go.
- Yogurt was definitely the right call, but I still have 1:13 left on this waffle.
- Perfect, the entire men’s soccer team just walked in.
- Glad I really put some effort into my brunch appearance.
- 16 SECONDS LEFT RED ALERT RED ALERT
- Get the plate ready. Get the fork ready.
- Okay, how come it’s impossible for me to get this golden waffle onto my plate in one piece?
- Like seriously, it should not be sticking this badly to the machine.
- Okay so I semi-salvaged the waffle.
- This waffle may not look the best but I’m sure the taste level will still be on point.
- Now the fun part: toppings time!
- Is there shame if I put some Cornell Dairy soft serve on top of this waffle?
- What am I even saying, brunch is a no shame zone.
- That’s right person behind me in line: I’m putting soft serve on top of my waffle.
- You don’t even have to hide your jealousy, I know you wish you were me right now.
- This waffle process maybe took a whole of 4 minutes but I feel like it’s been a half hour.
- Time to enjoy the masterpiece I have created.
- HALLELUJAH. I am in waffle heaven right now.
- Is that person wearing running clothes right now?
- Like have they actually already gone for a run this morning.
- Please let me know how you can have your life together like this.
- You know what? I can live that life if I want to!
- Maybe I will even go for a run later.
- The day is young, the possibilities are endless.
- *eats another bite of ice cream/waffle hybrid*
- You know on second thought Sunday should be more of a chill day. Who needs working out?
- I cannot believe I have been here for an hour just straight eating.
- Except when you think about it I have spent a majority of that time waiting in line.
- Who am I kidding though, I just ate way more than I needed too.
- But the brunch is so good how can I resist?
- Is it bad that I am semi-debating another plate of ravioli right now?
- I mean I’ve been here so long I’m practically hungry again at this point.
- NO what am I saying I do not need ravioli right now.
- Okay so like low key really want some ravioli but I am going to resist.
- Okay brunch is getting even more crowded.
- Maybe this is a sign that it’s time to go.
- BUT the longer I stay here the longer I can procrastinate my work.
- BUT the longer I stay here the more I am tempted to eat.
- When I look back on freshman year I’ll look fondly back on RPCC brunch.
- Can’t believe I was even considering Appel at one point.
- I mean how can you beat this brunch?
- Like please let me know if you figure it out.
- One meal swipe unlocks so many possibilities.
- I just had four very quality courses.
- I couldn’t eat any more if I tried.
- Okay that’s kinda a lie if presented with more food I could definitely eat it.
- RPCC has left me sufficiently satisfied though.
- Okay time for the walk of shame that is walking all my dirty plates to the dish return.
- Like how did I accumulate this amount of dishes?
- The amount of coordination I need to balance all of these right now…
- DON’T DROP IT DON’T DROP IT
- Andddd I dropped all my plates.
- Well now the entire room knows that I don’t mess around when it comes to brunch.
- Just pick everything up pretend like it didn’t happen.
- Would it really be brunch without an embarrassing moment?
- Now it is definitely time to leave.
- BUT not without leaving without a banana.
- I mean you’re allowed to take one piece of fruit with you.
- It would really be a waste if I didn’t capitalize on this opportunity.
- While I’m at it let’s just swipe a cookie too.
- It will be my parting gift from this wonderful brunch.
- In and out in under an hour.
- Look at all these peasants still in line to get in.
- Been there done that.
- Now on to the million other things I have to do.
- At least I started this day right.
- As always, RPCC Brunch: you did not disappoint.
