Tennis shots : Serve! Volley! Over there! Ace! Drink!
April 6, 2010 —
Jolly ho, chap!
I seem to be getting progressively less ambitious with my Hummingbird projects… Or, just more doable for the average Jose/Josephine. Anyway, this week, we’re making tennis shots—shot glasses made from tennis balls! You’re thinking: ‘Gross!’ And, ‘So impractical!’… but WRONG! They sit up just fine (no rolling around), the fuzzy hairy stuff doesn’t actually come off in your mouth, they’re JUST FUN, they’re actually only about half a real shot (so you can take twice as many), and hey, the weird rubber insides haven’t given me cancer yet.
The possibilities of games abound (abounce?). I think you could set them up all around a ping pong table, then play a tennis game, volleying back and forth with appropriate responses, like this: Serve! = you take a shot from the baseline; Return!= the opponent takes a baseline; Lob! = another baselinish shot, then charge the net; Over there! Volley! Ace! And repeat. Another version is to just shout out these shot names without physically representing them. Or play a categories type one, like go around listing famous tennis players. But no one really knows anything about tennis, so we usually just list off anything possibly related to tennis until someone runs out. Then we drink. Net! Clay! Pete Sampras! Ball Boy! [Head looking left, right, left, right]! Smash!
Let’s get started.
All we need is a few tennis balls, a serrated knife, and vodka (or rum, maybe gin, will work, too).
Just take the knife and cut the balls in half. USE EXTREME CAUTION. I first carefully poke into the balls with the tip of the knife to get a hole started. Then insert the blade into the hole and cut it like a bagel. To get started, you might have to grip around the bottom of the ball, but otherwise, cup it from the top with the knife between you and the ball, your thumb on one side and your four fingers on the other. This will help you keep all those fingers. I think there are certain bagel cutting devices that could help in this process. Just be really careful. Seriously.
If you’ve cut some balls in half and you’re still intact, then phew, and let’s continue. You’ll notice a powdery residue but that comes right out with a little water. Use soap too so you can tell your skeptical guests that you used water and soap.
Recap: We’ve gone from three balls to six half balls. More is more! They’re clean and ready to go! Fill ‘em up with your favorite shot and let the games begin!
LET’S HAVE JUST FUN
Sambledon
P.S. …You’ll notice that I haven’t painted anything Hummingbird yet… well, let’s make a shot-ski and paint that Hummingbird! But since the snow’s melted, let’s do a shot-oar or a shot-board. Just get a longish flatish stickish thing and glue a couple tennis shots onto it, about two or three feet apart—enough room so that people can put their mouths to the shots and still fit their shoulders in there. Even better, get some Velcro and glue the non-fuzzy side to the oar. I haven’t actually tried this but I bet the tennis balls might stick. Plus it’d be easy to wash them. Try to use a really good glue though, like I got this 527 glue at a craft store and it’s killer.