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Though Guy #2 can mainly be equated to a One Night Stand (Even though he’s one of my older brother’s best friends…oops...cat’s out of the bag on that one.) he actually did a lot for me...even beyond the bedroom. Between my Best Guy friend spelling it out for me in the car the morning after, and the painful- but great-sex I had at the party…I’d come to realize that Mobster Mansion boy (My Virginity Stealing “Boyfriend”) just couldn’t satisfy me. To put it pleasantly, he was “hung like an elf.” As if that summer in limbo before college wasn’t awkward enough as is…having sex with Mansion for the next 2 months developed into a comedic routine. What better way to gain sexual experience than on a boy you no longer craved for but who would provide you with free condoms. Alesse (Ovral L) For Sale, To fast forward to my Cornelian transition, I’d like to pretend, again, that I came to this fabulous institution as a fairly innocent girl. Though I’m not exactly sure why the sluttiest of us like to feign innocence, I’ll stick with it since it makes me feel slightly better inside about the raunchy stories that are about to ensue.

Two guys isn’t so bad...I mean I can pass one off as a boyfriend (Ok, we were just steady hook ups for ½ of senior year until we went to college…but a girl can dream.) and the other guy was just that one time. So I thought maybe I could come to Cornell and be someone different. Someone tamer. Someone who didn’t still have traces of mono in her immune system on the first day, or who hadn’t just finished reading Tucker Max’s I Hope they Serve Beer in Hell and drafting her own version of the story on an iPhone sticky note on the plane ride over, Alesse (Ovral L) For Sale. (Seriously though, get off my blog if you haven’t read that book. He’s literally a god. You want sex stories. They’re the real deal.) Anyway, I figured I’d be angelic here…or perhaps begin the next chapter of my life as such. Alesse (Ovral L) For Sale, But that all went down hill within my first 12 hours on campus.

Introducing…OWeek. Night #1 to be specific. Guess you’ll have to stay tuned ‘til next time to hear about what really went down after my parents left the dorm.

Xoxo,

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