Friday:

 

6:00 PM - Eat dinner.  Might as well get this weekend underway.  Not like you have anything to look forward to, what with all your friends out of town.  Sigh…

7:00 PM - Surf the web.  It’s just one of those days…  Find Facebook page for The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.  What the hell, might as well go, support local art.

8:00 PM - Attend The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.

9:15 PM - Walk out of the theater.  The world is aflame with joy and life. Did that really happen?  Did that magical, beautiful thing actually just happen?  This changes everything.

10:00 PM - Try to watch TV, but stop.  Nothing can compare to what you just witnessed.

11:15 PM - Conference call with all your friends.  Describe every sketch in The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.  They need to know.  The world needs to know.

11:55 PM - Think fondly of the night you had and go to sleep dreaming of The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.

 

Saturday:

 

3:00 AM - Wake up drenched in sweat.  Is it over?!?  Wait… there’s still one more performance of The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show. Take a deep breath and go back to sleep.  Close one.

8:00 AM - It’s here!  The day is finally here!  Go for a run with your renewed vigor.

10:00 AM - Have brunch in Becker Hall with the sad masses.  They have no idea what life can be.

12:00 PM - Print off 100 more posters for The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show. It’s your duty to the people of the world.  It’s your duty to The Skits-O-Phrenics.

2:00 PM - Rent out Barton Hall for the Skits-O-Phrenics. They need a bigger space. They need a bigger audience.

2:10 PM - Receive a polite “no” from the Skits-O-Phrenics. Turns out they want to keep their old performance space in Barnes Hall. That’s two-thousand dollars down the drain, but it was worth it to earn their trust.

4:00 PM - Begin planning your outfit for The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show. Everything must be perfect.

6:00 PM - Print out life size portraits of all the members of The Skits-O-Phrenics for autographs. They might say no, but it can’t hurt to ask.

7:00 PM - Rent a limo to bring you to The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show. Arrive in style.

8:00 PM - Attend The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.

9:15 PM - Leave Barnes Hall smiling.  How could you ever come down from this high?

9:30 PM - Climb McGraw tower.  You must sing the praises of The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show!

9:45 PM - Leave the tower.  Smile… then slowly frown.  It’s over. There will never be another The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.  You’re so alone now.

10:30 PM - Scream, “NO!  THIS CAN’T BE OVER!  I FINALLY HAVE LIFE FIGURED OUT AND I CAN’T EVEN SEE THE SKITS-O-PHRENICS MAKE IT TO NATIONALS!, AN ORIGINAL SKETCH COMEDY SHOW ANY MORE!”

11:00 PM - Come to your senses.  Realize there’s still a show to be seen as long as The Skits-O-Phrenics are living. Tonight, you plan.

 

Sunday:

 

4:55 AM  - Finish planning.  It’s perfect.  Today, you will see The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.  Tomorrow, you will see The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.  Every day hence, you will see The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show.

8:00 AM - Rent out Barnes Hall.  They clearly feel comfortable there, and you’re nothing if not a loving fan.

8:30 AM - Look over the plan again. It’s flawless!  The Skits-O-Phrenics will admire your ingenuity.

10:00 AM - Contact The Skits-O-Phrenics under the guise of a TV exec who loved the show.  Would they like to audition in Barnes at 5PM for a new TV sketch show?  Of course they would.  Their vanity will draw them to you like moths to a flame.

12:00 PM - Eat a big Sunday brunch at RPCC.  Yum!

4:55 PM - Leave Barnes door open.  They’ll enter when they’re ready.  Then, once again, you’ll see The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show. It is your right.

5:30 PM - Reveal yourself to The Skits-O-Phrenics, but not before locking the doors once and for all.  Now, you will never have to be without The Skits-O-Phrenics Make it to Nationals!, an original sketch comedy show again.

 

The Skits-O-Phrenics will be performing March 13th and 14th at 8:00 p.m. in Barnes Theater. To purchase tickets, email skitsophrenics@gmail.com. This post is sponsored by The Skits-O-Phrenics. To furnish your own sponsored content, please contact dani.kellner@www.slopemedia.org.