Author: Emily Harrington

With the never-ending prelim season in full swing now and no sign of winter ending anytime soon, all Cornell students can do to survive is count down the days until Spring Break. March seems to drag on for far too long – 4 full weeks of 9 AM’s, attempting  (but inevitably failing) to avoid slipping on black ice, and doing everything in our power to avoid the infamous @we_CU.  Luckily, March has one little ray of sunshine (an unfamiliar term to most Ithacans): St. Patrick’s Day.

 

This year, St. Patty’s Day falls on a Tuesday, which means you get to start Karaoke Tuesday approximately 12 hours earlier than usual.  Looking for a legitimate reason to skip your 10:10 rather than the usual “I’m exhausted because I stayed up until 3 AM watching “House of Cards” on Netflix?”  Well, lucky for you (no pun intended), celebrating your Irish heritage is the perfect excuse for missing class – and yes, it’s definitely kosher to use this excuse even if you’re not actually Irish. To make sure you have the absolute best St. Patty’s Day ever, we’ve provided the following foolproof guide to ensure the perfect celebration.

 

1. Attire: The greener the better, which means you should spend ample time planning your St. Patty’s Day attire. And anyways, who doesn’t look good in an outfit wholly made up of multiple shades of green? If you think you can get away with just tossing on a few beads and calling it a day, you’re mistaken. Girls, time to break out that dreaded Catholic school kilt you had to wear throughout the entirety of your awkward middle school years. Boys, invest in a top hat. Extra points for carrying around a pot of gold the whole day.
2. Activities:  St. Patty’s Day celebrations commence in the early morning of the 17th. The best way to celebrate St Patty’s Day Irish-style is a pub crawl, or, in our case, staying at Loco all day and then maybe making your way over to Dunbars. Just pretend you’re in a pub in Dublin rather than a small bar in Ithaca (use your imagination, okay?). Those with real endurance will stay all the way through Karaoke Tuesday. And please, no horrible St. Patty’s Day pickup lines. Just because it’s St. Patty’s Day, doesn’t mean you’ll get lucky (pun intended).
3. Irish Spirit: St. Patrick’s Day is all about celebrating the culture and heritage of the Irish. For those of you who don’t know (which probably includes the majority of you reading this article), the day actually honors Saint Patrick and the arrival of Christianity in Ireland. So make your Irish ancestors proud by rocking those shamrocks and feasting on corned beef and cabbage (tastes better than it sounds, promise.) Lots of cities have some pretty wild St. Patty’s Day traditions: the Chicago River is colored with 40 pounds of green dye and New York City has its annual St. Patrick’s Day Parade which goes for over 2 miles and includes over 150 bands. The parade of kids walking from Central to Collegetown isn’t quite as in sync as the NYC parade (and probably much less impressive), but that doesn’t mean we won’t be out celebrating this St. Patty’s Day with some Cornellian flair.

 

 

Happy St. Patty’s Day from Slope Media! Bonus points to anyone who recognizes this scene from our favorite Disney Channel Original Movie: