Presented by Cornell University’s Skimm’bassador Erica Baevsky

 

SOCIAL MEDIA NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU LIKE YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND’S NEW GIRLFRIEND’S SISTER’S PIC…

I just like to click, clicking’s my favorite! Instagram heard you stalking and decided it’s time to allow clickable ads. This makes Insta much friendlier to brands, which until now have been banging their heads against filters in a struggle to link out. That’s why you always see ‘link in bio.’ Now, brands will be able to buy ad “carousels” where users can scroll through photos (a la Hinge) with the option to click to buy/donate/make brands some money. To which advertisers have responded ‘double tap.’

 

BUSINESS NEWS

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND WHO SELLS CROCHET BABY HATS IN BULK…

Coulda been me. This week, Etsy — everyone’s favorite place to buy monogrammed jewelry and “Game of Thrones” cake pops – filed for a $100 million IPO. Etsy started 10 years ago as a small marketplace, and has since grown to be the online craft go-to, with almost 20 million buyers. Over the last two years, it’s started letting sellers outsource manufacturing, and some are worried that this IPO will make the company even less faithful to the DIY spirit.

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR COMPANY IS HIRING…

Warren Buffett’s making some decisions too. For years, Berkshire Hathaway shareholders have been dying to know who will succeed the legendary founder, chairman, CEO and ping-pong enthusiast Warren Buffett. Buffett, now 84-years-old, has been a big tease by saying the board knows who will replace him in the top job, but never giving a name. Until this week, when his business partner Charlie Munger hinted at two people on the shortlist to be CEO, saying, “Ajit Jain and Greg Abel are proven performers who would probably be under-described as ‘world-class.’” Meaning yes, two men named Jain and Abel are apparently in competition for the same job.

 

CONGRESS NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU CAN’T FIND ANYTHING GOOD ON TV…

On last week’s episode of “The Real Housewives of DC”…the Department of Homeland Security almost ran out of money until Congress passed a bill to fund it for a grand total of one week. Thankfully, Congress finally passed a $40 billion bill on Tuesday to bankroll the department for the rest of the fiscal year, averting the threat of a shutdown. Yes, we’re talking about the same Homeland Security that is in charge of keeping everyone safe. And the reason this came down to the wire? The GOP took issue with many of President Obama’s immigration executive actions, which are funded through the department. They’ve been trying for months to figure out a way to de-fund his immigration plan while keeping the rest of the department open. But they couldn’t come up with anything that would fly with Senate Democrats. In the Season 3 finale, they passed a bill that doesn’t include any measures to de-fund Obama’s immigration plan.

 

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU WAKE UP READY TO TAKE ON THE WEEK…

So did Iraq’s military. On Monday, it launched a major operation to take back the city of Tikrit from ISIS. Tikrit: a northern city less than 100 miles from Iraq’s capital. Its claim to fame is that it’s Saddam Hussein’s hometown. Tikrit fell to ISIS last summer when the militant group went on an epic land-grabbing spree. Today’s operation is the military’s third try to retake the city, but this time it has closely coordinated with thousands of volunteer militia fighters. Regaining control of Tikrit is seen as crucial, since it is between Baghdad and Mosul – Iraq’s second largest city, which has basically been ISIS HQ in the country since last summer.

 

OLD NEWS

WHAT PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT…

Tamir Rice. It’s been more than three months since the black 12-year-old was shot and killed by a Cleveland police officer while playing with a pellet gun in public. Last Friday, Cleveland officially responded to the Rice family’s wrongful death lawsuit against the city. The city said that the boy’s death was a direct result of his own actions, and that he didn’t “exercise due care to avoid injury.” Surveillance footage shows a patrol car stopping near Rice, and an officer shooting the boy as soon as they pull up to him. The officers were responding to a 911 call describing someone with a gun, but warning that the gun might be a fake. The Rice family’s lawsuit accuses the officers of using excessive force, of not taking proper medical care of the boy after he had been shot, and of tackling his 14-year-old sister when she tried to help him.

 

DEATH NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN SOMEONE BRINGS UP THE KNICKS’ RECORD…

They could use a few more players like Anthony Mason. The former NBA Knicks player died over the weekend, after being hospitalized with heart problems last month. He was 48. Mason was a key defender back in the 90s when the Knicks were good, protecting the team’s superstars like Patrick Ewing and Charles Oakley. Last Saturday, Michael Jordan called him “one of the toughest competitors of his era.” Mason is survived by his two sons.

 

POLITICAL NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR PHONE ACCIDENTALLY EMAILS YOUR OFFICE FROM YOUR PERSONAL ADDRESS…

Hillz feels ya. This week, The New York Times reported that former Sec.of State Hillary Clinton only used a personal email address during her tenure. And it turns out that her more casual way of doing things may have violated federal requirements. It’s apparently very unusual for a high-profile official to exclusively use a personal account. Not only did Hillz do this, but she reportedly didn’t even have a government email address. This reportedly isn’t the norm because it makes it harder to keep a record of emails, and also because personal addresses aren’t as secure as government accounts. Meanwhile, Bill didn’t have the best Monday either. There’s something he didn’t know until now about a presidential portrait of him hanging in the National Portrait Gallery. In a recent interview, the artist said that he secretly included the shadow of Monica Lewinsky’s dress. So it’s a stain in more ways than one.

 

ENTERTAINMENT NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED WAS ON NETFLIX…

The box office noticed. According to The Hollywood Reporter, China beat the US in box office revenue for the first time ever last month. China raked in $650 million, while the US pulled $640 million. Close but no fortune cookie. While many in the industry saw this as inevitable, it’s a BFD because it shows China taking over in an industry the US has always dominated. It helped that last month marked the Lunar New Year holiday in China aka a time when lots of people head to the movies. It also maybe helped that most people in the US couldn’t go outside.

 

LEGAL NEWS

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU KEEP THINKING IT’S THURSDAY…

Alabama’s having a confusing week too. On Tuesday night, the state’s supreme court ordered Alabama judges to stop issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples . For weeks, there’s been mass confusion over whether or not these couples can get hitched. Earlier this year, a federal judge ruled that Alabama’s bans on same-sex marriage were unconstitutional, and last month, couples were supposed to start saying ‘I do.’ But Alabama’s Chief Justice disagreed, and ordered state judges not to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The US Supreme Court said same-sex marriages could go on as planned. Hence, confusion. Alabama says Tuesday’s decision will give “some stability” in the state until the Supremes hand down a definitive ruling on same-sex marriage later this year .

 

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